you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
