Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
