This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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