No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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