i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
