sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
