what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
