But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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