Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
i think my tv is drunk
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Pooping to opera.
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