Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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