Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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