i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Randomize
