question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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