ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
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