nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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