Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I just made out with a guy for $7.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize