Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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