Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize