Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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