Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
