Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
