She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize