Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
