Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
