You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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