just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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