drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Randomize
