What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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