Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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