I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
