Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
