Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Duck Duck Cougar?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Randomize
