the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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