:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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