So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize
