I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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