why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
