Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
You took a bar mat shot.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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