How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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