We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
