That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
