I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
