Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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