I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Randomize
