There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
