he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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