break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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