How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Randomize