Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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