"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
