OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize